7 Things You Should Really Know About Your Partner Before Tying The Knot

Falling in love is a wonderful thing, but too often couples rush into marriage without knowing much about each other. This often leads to divorce. In the United States, fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. If you want to give your marriage a fighting chance, be sure to learn these seven things about your partner before tying the knot.


1. Does Your Partner Want To Start A Family? – Planning a family is an important part of marriage. If you want kids and your partner doesn’t, or vice versa, the disagreement can create a serious rift in the relationship. For some men and women, reproducing is a nonnegotiable issue, so it’s important to have this conversation with your partner before you agree to spend the rest of your lives together. Even if the two of you disagree on whether or not to have kids, there is still plenty of room for compromise, and it’s better to get that stuff out of the way sooner rather than later. If you do want a family, you can make both of your lives easier by purchasing a baby monitor. 


2. Does Your Partner Have Any Addictions? – Addictions to drugs and alcohol can damage a marriage beyond repair. These addictions are expensive, time consuming, and can alter the personality of the addict in a negative way. Also, even if your partner is clean and sober, a history of addiction might mean that they will relapse in the future. It’s okay to marry someone with addictions, as long as you know what you’re getting into before you sign up for such a major commitment. Knowing about the addiction beforehand will keep you from being caught off guard, and will allow you to give your partner the treatment they need to get better. 


3. Does Your Partner Have Any Debt? – The last thing you want after making a marriage commitment is to discover your partner has crippling financial debt. Marriage is a legal institution that, in some cases, makes you responsible for your partner’s debt. In certain circumstances, the debt of a marriage partner can mean that both of your credit scores will be ruined. That makes it harder to get loans for homes and automobiles. Ask your partner if they have any debt. Be kind about it, and offer to help them clear it up, but make sure you know one way or the other before tying the knot. 

4. What Are Your Partner’s Religious Beliefs? – While it may seem trivial to question your partner about their religious beliefs, it is important to know if their views will clash with your own in a significant way. For example, if you are a Christian and your partner is a Satanist, Sunday mornings will be awkward. If your partner is a member of a Doomsday cult that believes the world will explode, you’ll want to know that before putting a ring on their finger. Chances are good that your partner’s religious beliefs will be tame and harmless, if they even have any at all, but when it comes to a lifetime commitment it’s better to be safe than sorry. 


5. Does Your Partner Have A Dangerous Past? – Has your partner ever spent time in jail? Have they ever been prone to fits of violent rage? Do they have any unsavory jealous ex-lovers who might appear out of nowhere someday? These are questions you will definitely want the answers to before walking down the aisle. Your personal safety and peace of mind depend on knowing if your partner has a dangerous past, and it’s only common courtesy for them to be honest about it with you. You are going to be spending the rest of your life with this person, and it’s important to know about any dangerous baggage they might be bringing along. 


6. What Are Your Partner’s Political Beliefs? – Opposing political beliefs can cause a lot of nasty arguments in a marriage. Two people don’t need to share the same politics to build a happy marriage, but you’ll want to find out ahead of time if your partner has any political ideas that you simply cannot tolerate. For example, of you are a pacifist you might have difficulty being married to a rabid warmonger. This would also be a good opportunity to make sure that you and your partner are on the same page when it comes to major issues like race and gender equality. It’s not the end of the world if the two of you don’t always agree on politics, but any possible political deal-breaker should be discovered before it’s too late to back out. 

7. Does Your Partner Have Serious Medical Issues? – Medical issues can mean a couple different things. If your partner has a mental disorder, you might want to ensure that they’re receiving the proper care and that they don’t pose any threat to you. The second type of medical issue is a debilitating illness that will force you to spend the rest of your life being a caregiver to a very sick person. Perhaps you love your partner enough to make that sacrifice, but do yourself a favor and find out before the wedding. If you know about a serious illness ahead of time, you can weigh the pros and cons and make an educated decision.


Discovering the answers to these seven questions will give your marriage a good chance of going the distance, something that is a pretty big deal in a society where only half of marriages survive. While it may be next to impossible to discover what all women and all men secretly want out of life, you can at least find out what your partner wants and use this valuable information to build a strong lasting marriage. Remember that obstacles can sometimes be tolerated or even overcome altogether. The only way to know if your partner is right for you is to learn the most important things about them. If you fail to take these precautions, your marriage won’t stand a chance. 

28 Comments to 7 Things You Should Really Know About Your Partner Before Tying The Knot

  1. This is something I wish more people would actually look at when they are considering getting married. I think that divorce has become the norm, and I think it’s mostly because people marry I don’t like and lust and not love.

  2. Pam

    These are definitely important things to know before getting married. I think anyone in a serious relationship should broach these topics.

  3. Anosa

    These are definitely some must know things before getting married that’s why I prefer to date longer so I can learn this and more

  4. These are all great things to think about before getting married. Marriage is a big deal, so I can see why these 7 things you should know before committing legally to someone.

  5. These are definitely some good things to discuss beforehand. A marriage with someone you barely know could be difficult.

    • Pam Wattenbarger

      I agree. You really need to know all about someone before you get married to them or it could be disastrous.

  6. Stephen

    These are all valuable lessons to learn and to discuss. My partner and I will have been together for 9 years before we tie the knot – I know WAY longer than expected but we are glad for it!

  7. Rebecca Swenor

    These are great things to know about your partner before getting married. It is so important to know if your partner wants start a family and to know about your partners past I believe. Thanks for sharing the list.

  8. Your questions are scary to dive into but so necessary. Better know before heart ache is bigger right?

  9. There are so many couples that are more interesting in having the wedding of the year instead of working on their marriage that should last a lifetime. Weddings are so much fun to plan, but more extensive plans should be made on having a lasting marriage.

  10. These are all very good things to know about your partner before getting married. I find religion and debt are huge discussions for couples.

  11. I love these questions!! It is so important to look at everything when you are considering marriage so important to know who you are marrying.

  12. Dee

    I am so glad that you created this list. This list are questions that people should be having before they marry someone. It does not make sense to not know who you plan on spending the rest of you life with.

  13. These are all extremely important to find out about! I think the most important one being if they want a family or not , that one can really cause a lot of issues

  14. This is an important list of things to know before walking down the aisle. Knowing each party’s financial situation and lifetime goals are so important!

  15. Great tips! I think it’s very important to talk about financial situation and agree on something!

  16. I agree. These are all certainly must-knows before getting married! It is also extremely important to be on the same page about finances. Not just about debt but how to plan for a financial future. So many marital disagreements are about money.

  17. The main point we teach our children about a potential spouse is spiritual beliefs. A relationship is hard to maintain if you are unequally yoked.

  18. I should have had this discussion before we got together. I’m so thankful that our views were in line.

  19. Bonnie @wemake7

    These are all very important to know about your soon to be partner. Great post.

  20. Hi, saw your post through the Chinoy bloggers group in Facebook, your article is a very nice read, hope you could feature our site in your blog. God bless.

  21. These are great things to ponder upon. I do not believe in whirlwind romance ending in marriage. It is best to truly know the person you intend to spend the rest of your life with.

  22. I do not believe in whirlwind romance ending up in marriages. It is always best to know the person you intend to spend the rest of your life with. Thanks for these tips, they are all worth asking your partner about it.

  23. Getting married is a serious stage in a relations, the two parties should know each other well before going into this.

  24. This is a great article! As someone who is newly engaged, these are definitely important things to know about a future spouse.

  25. This is such an on-point list of the things each person must know before getting married. Marriage shouldn’t be rushed at all.

  26. I wish more people had the courage to conduct those conversations before they get married. There are so many misunderstandings that could be avoided if people took the time to tame their physical yearnings and concentrate on the real issues of marriage, of life. I enjoyed this read :)

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